Amber L Bock

substance abuse counselor

A short biography is that I was born into a family of lies, experienced severe child abuse, neglect, and was even given away by my mother. I became addicted to drugs, what trafficked as a child, and ended up aging out of the state always on the run. I knew God was calling me but I never picked up his call and I continue to run far away from him. Eventually I got into pornography, which is where I heard God‘s voice loudest. He told me what I was doing was wrong and then I had to stop and he kept impressing on my heart to quit the things I was doing, including living a life of homosexual behavior. I loved one of mine passed away, and that night I knew she was gonna die and prayed for her to go to Heaven in the morning. I had a phone call, confirming her passing away. That impress upon me to continue trying to not survive the way I was surviving, I enrolled into college. Unfortunately, for me that did not help my situation as I was introduced to even worse drugs than I was on before I ended up doing heroin, methamphetamines, and even overdosed. Even though it wasn’t my first time to commit suicide, I remember wanting to run in front of cars and get hit because of a failed attempt to hang myself. The whole time I could hear the devil, encouraging me, tearing me down telling me I was worthless, and that the only way out was to die. Eventually, as I continue to pass and survival in the streets around gangbangers, living a life of crime, I ended up having children. It was with this guy who I had my two of my children with that I escaped the lifestyle. It wasn’t until after he broke my nose and I went to treatment and that is where I begin the process of finding recovery, and eventually recognizing who God was, and eventually becoming a Christian. Not only did I have those two kids, I have one that was a product of a pimp, who I did not raise, and an abortion that I never talked about. I am now married, with four kids at home and on a path to become a better wife, a better mother, and navigating a path that I am not worthy. It’s because of Christ that I’m able to forgive myself and work towards living life, that he has set out for me. It’s almost funny that I was born into darkness, experienced the darkness, found a light of Christ, and with Him as a lantern, I get to walk back into the darkness to help others.